this monday at the hideout
"Me So Horny." This will be the biggest Hideout show so far, in terms of onstage personnel -- 4-man horn section and rhythm section -- not necessarily talent or emotional intensity. Time Out Chicago has this to offer: "The groan-inducing title of tonight's program, Me So Horny!, is just another way of spelling out the fact that Fulks has enlisted a horn section to do his folk-rock bidding." Hey, fuckers! "Tonight's program," indeed. The cover of the magazine in question has a sideways picture of a young man with a 2-day beard, chubby cheeks, and uncombed hair, wearing a Desi Arnaz expression of "Lu-u-u-cy!" comic bemusement; the caption below him says, "Andrew Mason is about to change the way you shop -- again." So I assume Time Out is seeking to enlist a large army of overprivileged lily-white urban trendriders to do its idiotic-conspicuous-consumption bidding, and that that depressing seasonal spectacle is less groan-inducing than an aggressively idiotic pun. But, upon inspection of the issue's contents, idiot puns are perhaps not at issue after all. A story about an art gallery is titled "Framing the Issue." "True Brit" is the drop-dead bit of brilliance adorning an article on an English chef. Headline for a piece on the star of a reality show called The Vice Guide to Everything -- beat the groany editors to this one if you can: "Vice Cop"! A pictorial on holiday parties is called "Wear It's At." For tips on recycling everyday household goods, "Tossed and Found" was deemed a corker. A quick flip through the rest of the rag reveals (you don't need to know the story subjects to enjoy these delicious wordplays) "Clothes Encounter," "(Face) Time Machine," "Presidential Selection," "Gospel Untruths" (a groan unducer!), "Purple Reign," and "Buke and Gass." Oh, that's a band name, but, ha ha ha: after you get inured to the parade of whimsical phraselets, even non-puns look a lot like puns. See if Buke and Gass what I'm thinking!
What I'm thinking is that at next Monday's show, I'll read the long list of all the worse wordplays I discarded on my way to "Me So Horny!," which, the La Rochefoucaulds at People Magazine for Dummies notwithstanding, still makes me chortle.
6 comments
Kudos to my 17 year-old stepson Victor, who, upon receiving his first gift subscription issue of Time Out (from a well-meaning relative), flipped through it once and immediately relegated all future issues to the recycle bin.
Embouchure going to try and make this show!
Hornucopia, Hornet’s Nest, Horna-palooza.
Don't forget the sex column titled "In&Out" where TOC's sexpert tackles your most penetrating questions.
I would have to stand by Time Out Chicago on this. "Me So Horny" is a truly groan-inducing and overused pun no matter how you slice it. I wouldn't doubt it if Time Out has used it in the past. In my book, you're both guilty of puns against humanity.
Robbie Sulks is more like it...